This is the first complete draft of the article, and, as I said, this is my first SCP, so stuff might be a bit rough. Tear it apart guys. Criticism welcome.
A contaminant facility for SCP-4XXX is to be constructed
I'd recommend using a site, since it will use less characters than constantly using the word "facility" — plus it makes things go by smoother later down the line.
and made to look like world war one era trench tunnels.
Recommend capitalizing World War One, or have it as WW1/WWI, World War I, etc. It looks better that way, imo.
Personnel stationed at the facility are to report any suicidal thoughts, or tendencies as well as any symptoms of bipolar depressive disorder.
Recommend changing it to this,
Site-XX personnel are to report any suicidal ideation, and are to be evaluated for Biopolar Depressive Disorder.
(Also, as a side note, I'd recommend against using mental illness unless you know your stuff. Not saying you can't, but just want to warn you)
Additionally, all on-site staff are required to attend routine psychological examinations by on-site psychologists.
If you use the above change, you could outright not use this line, making the containment procedures less bloated.
Following authorization by assigned psychologist and a recovery period of 12 months, affected personnel reinstated, and reassigned to a different site, and discouraged from working on projects that involve psychological anomalies, or anomalous memetic properties.
maybe this is just me, but I think the Foundation would be very thorough before they assign an individual to a site or anomaly that might affect their mental health. I don't know, it feels like you're describing a scenario that could be outright avoided if the Foundation just made absolutely sure about the mental health of their employees before allowing them to be assigned to an SCP. It'd be more efficient that way to not have people constantly reassigned to different anomalies because they're not mentally prepared to do so.
Testing must have level-3 approval
Level-3.
After finishing the containment procedures, I feel you should cut some things out of them. They feel too bloated, specifically the mental health passage. I feel like you could just rewrite it to the following:
Foundation personnel with a history of depressive disorders are not to be assigned to SCP-XXXX. On-site personnel are to undergo a bi-monthly1 psychological evaluation. Any personnel experiencing suicidal ideation or undergo symptoms of depressive disorders are to be reassigned to other Sites.
This conveys the information you want to get across in a short amount of words.
This effect, and the memetic effects of the content of SCP-4XXX-1 persist through live, and prerecorded camera feeds as well as photographs.
This is difficult to understand — I'd recommend to rewriting the following to this
SCP-XXXX-1's effects are consistent among photographs and footage (live and prerecorded).
Or something along those lines.
similar to that of bipolar depressive disorder, and run a severely increased risk of developing post-traumatic stress disorder.
I very much dislike this part of the article — it feels like you're using a mental disorder for your article just for the sake of it. Additionally, assuming you're attempting to deal with shell shock, shell shock is different than most depressive or PTSD related disorders. Shellshock was not only a mental phenomenon, but a physical phenomenon. While I'm not a professional, you shouldn't just treat shellshock as PTSD — while yes it may very well by PTSD, the fact is is that just describing it as PTSD doesn't get across the horror of shellshock victims. It was a physical as well as mental trauma — sometimes victims could barely walk. Additionally, bipolar disorder doesn't seem to make sense here at all.
Overall, my main problem with this is that it doesn't really deserve the title of "shellshock" in my opinion. Not only that, I feel like it cheapens the horrors of war by attributing the shellshock and suicides of these soldiers to an anomaly instead of to, well, the horrors of war, physical and mental. I find a skip about the living conditions of these soldiers, the daily mental and physical grind of these soldiers, living apart from their families, killing people who had never personally wronged them, etc. to be more interesting then an anomaly that boils down to "it makes you depressed and makes you want to kill yourself." That's a cop out, and one that cheapens the suffering that world war 1 veterans went through by ascribing their suffering not to war but to an anomaly (at least in this region anyways).
The anomaly itself, as I stated before, boils down to "it makes you depressed and makes you want to kill yourself" which is just boring. It isn't scary, because it's been done to death on the wiki. And the worst part is you have so much rich material here. World War 1 was the first modern war in history, dispelling the idea that war was noble or honorable or good. So many good subject matters to discuss — social pressure, mocking mental disorders as cowardly, propaganda's view of the war and the actualities of its brutal nature, etc. And the way you decide to go about one of the most interesting social effects of the war (shellshock) is to boil it down to "it makes you go crazy". Plus, I feel the use of the "book that knows when you die" part is tacked on, and doesn't really connect well with the historical period at all. I honestly think you could cut it and it wouldn't make a difference.
My main suggestion is to come up with another idea. You can do something interesting with WWI era shellshock, or the social effects of it, or the symptoms of it, and the horror that evokes. But, as is, it's just boiling down a real-world horror and ascribing it to a fictional creation, which I can't support at all.